well well well... another day in holles street. 3 hari lagi nak final obgyn and i am feeling like crap towards the subject.
this afternoon, sebelum masuk ke antenatal clinic, han dah ade about 50% confidence nak buat long case and osce this friday. but after about an hour later, dah jadik -50%. why?
need i explain? it's tuesday so ----> pastilah antenatal clinic consultant kesayangan kami, You-know-who.
tadi memule takde la nervous sgt, sebab time tutorial semalam beliau sudah agak mellow as compared to masa mula2 we were back in that hell after the heavenly coombe hospital. then, han mmg dah kene telan hidup-hidup. but i decided to just forget about it. tapi now i menyesal. i should just ponteng je that clinic instead, daripada suffer from good-thoughts deprivation, lack of confidence macam ni.
han tau, ade orang yang cakap, just ignore what he says or does to you, sebab mmg tu hobi die : make the students' life miserable. so we should just laugh it off kan. which was what i tried to do. senang la you people cakap when you are never under his 'care and protecting' wings. tapi, try to be in my shoes : when his face was just 2 inches away from yours, and his mouth just couldn't stop calling you names... haih.. it is really devastating.
nasib baik there was the nurses there, and some of our collegue. so han pun terpaksa maintain macho walhal klu ikutkan hati, dah berlinangan air mata there and then.
i was butchered alive, and currently third-quarter dead. tinggal quarter lagi jiwa yang perlu diusung ke exam day.
people, obgyn in that hell is hard. and mental. eh, no. it's just you who become mental from it.
harap-harap he will not be my examiner this friday. sebab if he is, may be i'll just surrender sebelum buat apape. please, i've had enough of him.
sekian. doakan kami sukses hari jumaat nanti, walaupun dengan jiwa yang koyak-rabak.
[thanks bie. your patience i admire.]
